First day back to work since the day before Christmas Eve. The hurricane outside didn't make it any more enjoyable to wake up. Got absolutely soaked on the way to work. Miserable start to the working year.
As a society, I think we need to come to some sort of official agreement about when we should stop wishing people Happy New Year. I think it should be 12.00am on 2nd of January. That gives you 24 hours to say Happy New Year to as many people as you like. We don't go around wishing people Merry Christmas on the 29th of December, even though it's technically still Christmas. In fact, if anyone wishes my a Happy New Year tomorrow, I'm just going to say 'Merry Christmas'.
I don't think I have ever seen rain and wind like this. I sit on the 5th floor at work and noticed it raining upwards this morning.
There was an email in my inbox from Kellogs. A few weeks ago I bought a box of Raisin Wheats, probably my favourite cereal. I went to pour the cereal into my bowl and out popped one gigantic Raisin Wheat. I was pretty excited about this at the time. However, when I bit into it, I realised that it was just a gigantic Wheat...no Raisin. It was drier than Gandhi's feet! I couldn't even swallow it. So I emailed Kellogs and explained the situation, thinking I might be offered a lifetime's supply of the cereal. The response from Kellogs was extremely apologetic but they only offered to send a £3 voucher to reimburse me for the product. The good news is that the cereal only cost me £2.50 so I'm 50p up!
Got a phone call as I was leaving work from my grandma. She wanted to know if Tamara likes her head. Let me explain...
About four or five months ago, I got a call from my grandma. She told me that she really wants to make a sculpture of a head. My grandma often makes little sculptures and figurines at her pottery class, so this was quite normal and no cause for alarm. What was not quite normal and a definite cause for alarm was that she wanted to make a sculpture of Tamara's head. I mentioned this to Tamara and she seemed to be ok with it.
Over the course of the next couple of weeks, my grandma phoned Tamara relentlessly asking for photos of her head from all different angles. From the left, from the right, from above, from below, hair in a bun, hair in a ponytail...everything. Bearing in mind that Tamara doesn't like me taking photos of her at the best of times, how do you think she reacted when I told her that my grandma needed a photo from underneath her chin, looking up her nostrils?
Anyway, the photos were sent and all was forgotten about for a couple of months. A few weeks later my grandma phoned me up while I was at work. The conversation went something like this:
Grandma: Hi Matt, how are you?
Me: Fine thanks, how are you?
Grandma: Yeah fine. Listen Matt, I need to know if you're planning on getting engaged to Tamara
Me: Errrr why?
Grandma: Well I was hoping to give the head of Tamara to you as an engagement present
Me: Errrr I have no idea. I haven't planned anything
Grandma: Ok well can you let me know by Friday as I need to know whether I should get Tamara's head encased in bronze
Just a normal conversation. I managed to persuade her not to get the head encased in bronze. She told me that she was going to bake the head in the oven, paint it, then give it to me for Christmas.
I found out the next day that the head had exploded in the oven. However, the pottery teacher had helped her put it back together. Woohoo!
So as I type this blog, I am being stared at blankly by a life-size clay sculpture of my girlfriend's head. It's pretty impressive...it just doesn't look anything like her. So, to be more factually accurate, I am being stared at blankly by a life-size clay sculpture of a random girl's head.
Still, it's a great place to keep my sunglasses!
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